UPDATE?!

Sure, why not?!

 

A lot has happened since I last blogged - months ago!

 

Where did I leave off?

 

Ok, after our miscarriage I was shaken, but confident that Clomid was our best chance at finally having our mini Stell.

I took the 4th round of Clomid KNOWING that we would get pregnant. Maybe because our doctor seemed so confident?

I can tell you right now it didn't work.

No matter! It worked once - it would work again. To my understanding we have 2 more tries so maybe lucky number 3 would work out again. Let's do this!

 

Well......you know that song - it's an oldie but goody - "Breaking Up Is Hard To Do"?!

I totally got broken up with friends!!!

The doctor that I adore and put all of my trust in totally broke up with me.

Now, to be fair, I'm being dramatic...and I still adore her.

 

I was mistaken by the comment she made about trying another "round" of Clomid. In my mind I thought she meant the 3 times again when she actually meant - let's try one more time and see what happens.

 

I called her nurse and asked to refill my Clomid for round 5 and there was a pause and then a ummmm Dr. S would like to speak to you. Hold please.

 

Had I been flagged?! What the heck!

 

She got on the phone and said all the casual hi's and how are you's...

Then the shiz got real.

She said she had been where we are and she didn't want to see me be disappointed when we could be trying other things that might bring actual results.

I told her I loved Clomid. That was OUR way to get that result. She said that even if it worked she would be nervous that I would need more monitoring throughout the cycle and after.

See...she broke up with me. The whole "it's not you, it's me" situation.

I guess since that never happened to me growing up everyone has to go through it at least once.

Why now?! Middle school would have been way more tolerable. Maybe not... Moving on.

 

She then referred us to HER specialist who is responsible for her two beautiful IVF babies.

I had my reservations bc through blogging I have the seen the good bad and the ugly of the whole "fertility racket". Yes, someone called this huge time is our lives a racket. Ass.

 

I prayed and prayed. I asked God to make it clear what path we should take. This doctor. A different doctor. I prayed for peace with the situation if this was right and in God's great plan.

 

I knew hands down that I would walk out if it seemed the man hadn't looked at our file, didn't want to hear our story, and said "IVF is your only option  - hand over the money".

 

That didn't happen.

We went to our consultation and we were so impressed. We checked in. Waited MAYBE 5 minutes then met the man that I really feel will be able to answer so many of our questions throughout this journey.

We sat down and he knew EVERYTHING. He actually had read and looked over our file! I mean - I thought that was really cool. We talked almost an hour. He actually was going to school for orthopedics but his wife started struggling with infertility and it made him shift focus. Love him.

 

So now that you know I love yet another doctor ( I swear I'm not that easy to please) this is what he said we should do.

 

MORE CLOMID!

LOL!

 

Like I said - the stuff works ;)

 

I'm a little frustrated and impatient because I have to wait for a cycle before we can do the dye test to make sure I'm not blocked or scarred or whatever else could be an issue in that area.

I told the nurse on the phone that I was pretty dang positive that nothing was going to happen on its own so they should just go ahead and induce a period.

She said no. Rude.

Soooo I have to wait until cycle day 35. THIRTY FIVE?! and then call to get the prescription to start my period. Last time it took 10 days for the meds to bring aunt Flo. That puts us into Thanksgiving week - ummmm somebody better be scanning some tubes on Black Friday, just sayin'...and they better like it.

 

After the scan and they find everything is PERFECT (amen, amen, amen) (it's going to happen)

I am going to start a new round of monitored Clomid - maybe a trigger shot - and then readers the doc is pulling out the big guns. I'm kidding. We are just doing an IUI. JUST?! This kind of takes some pressure off of us though which I'm super excited about. We will know exactly when I ovulate and exactly when to get those little swimmers into place. So pressure! So nice.....

 

So hopefully this happens in December!

We are so very excited!

This was our pic just leaving the consultation:

Cute, right?! Ok, J might look a litttttle creepy BUT love him anyway!

 

That's our update.

No mini Stell just yet - but we are moving ahead!

Faith in our hearts and hope on our side!

 

 

 

Sending a hug to anyone going through infertility. It can be a huge struggle if you let the pain creep into your heart. Protect your relationships, protect your hope and faith, mostly protect your heart. Know that God has His plan and His plan is GOOD and PERFECT!

 

XO

 

Lauren